I don't really know whats up with me lately. I'm just constantly in a bad mood or then just practically in the verge of tears. And I know it's going to be so awkward if my friends read this, but I guess I'm kind of counting on no one reading this yet. Whether or not that is the case, this period of time is not the best one I've ever had.
Part of it is work, part people and relationships and part just simply me. I don't want to talk about my work and generally like it, but of course I don't always see eye to eye with everyone. And today was one of those days. It is stressful enough as it is.
I don't even remember which day it was last week, but I just got completely "paralyzed". Music can easily do that, when there's something that triggers a memory or a feeling. I usually try to avoid those songs. But things happen. So yeah, that was just a sudden big blow and ended up in a sort of an anxiety attack. Then add a horrible nightmare to that, after you finally are able to fall asleep, and you have a great start for the rest of the week.
Then of course there's the "relationships" stuff, which actually is and pretty much always has been non-existent. I can make a whole series of posts about that. Let's just say for now that things have been disappointing in the previous months. Not that that's news. I honestly don't expect to ever find the right guy, but more on that some other post. Now I just want to declare that I'm not feeling great, happy or anything similar and just want to crawl under the blanket, not do anything that has any purpose and so forth.
/end whining here.